I’m at the halfway mark! And everything’s going perfect!
Countless positive changes have been achieved in the first half of my “30 days to WonderWoman Status”. But because this is a blog about “trying” for success, there inevitably must be some failures.
Fail #1 …. Here I am happily using my INCREDIBLE new Genius Ultra device….
with the plastic still on. The whole time thinking how I’d take these cool photos to show all of you what a cool person I am, with my cool new toy. See that happy face? Totally oblivious. Funny part….it was still effective. Unbelievable before and after pics coming soon!
Fail #2 (and 3,4,5….10) I still eat candy bars.
These tasty little bites of chocolate called to me at work…they actually spoke…“Tiffany… We taste good. You miss us. Eat us NOW”. How could I argue? Yes, I’m on a cleanse. Sugar, corn syrup and gluten are NOT allowed. But I NEEDED it. They TOLD me so.
The cravings lessen every day, but carbs, fats and sugars sing to me still, usually right before bed. Often, I’ve felt like giving up this whole dang thing, because it can be HARD to stick to the plan. But…..Progress not perfection, that’s the deal I made with myself and my Arbonne coaches. I’m still winning. 🙂
These are small failures, little embarrassments I can laugh at. But the fear of failure, judgement, and scrutiny is real….. I mean, I’ve put pictures on the internet of my bare, makeup – less face! I’m doing really frightening things like making phone calls, hosting workshops, testing products, talking to strangers. I’ve committed publicly to a project, on the basis that it’s going to work… I’m committing to a new level of self care and forgiveness. It’s terrifying. The only thing to do is carry on as if I will succeed. “Carpe Diem” as my dad likes to say.
Pema Chodron says it bluntly….Fail. Fail again. Fail better. She teaches us to get comfortable with uncertainty. To see the joy when things fall apart. These 30 days are ALL ABOUT that uncertainty…taking a chance, mustering courage, believing in myself.
I need more spaces in my life where “failure” is acceptable; where mistakes are welcomed as a means for growth, not grounds for surrender. Yoga gives me the platform to practice this.
Yoga used to intimidate me, but I’ve been to all the REALLY scary classes (remember Insanity and Step Aerobics Boot Camp?) Compared to those, Yoga is a good friend. Comforting, soothing, steadfast….except for Sniffy Grunty guy. He’s not soothing at all. Sniffy Grunty guy finds floor space right next to me and uses “inhale through your nose….exhale through your mouth” as an excuse to sniff in all the snotty phlegm, then grunt out all the stinky breath. Picture it, I dare you.
Despite good old Sniff-Grunt breathing in my space, I love Yoga because no one is excluded. You might FEEL like you’re excluded, but if that’s the case you do not understand the nature of Yoga. “Don’t Judge, Don’t Compare, Don’t Beat Yourself Up” (Esther Nagle). It’s a PRACTICE, right??? All are invited, no matter your level of experience.
Last week, I looked to my left while in “Extended Triangle” and noticed “Starbeam” or “Willow Leaf” or whatever that gorgeous super-fit Hippie’s name is… (you know the one, an impeccable Lotus in a sports bra, printed tights and tiny nose ring)…and I started to put myself down. I caught my reflection in the mirror, though, and remembered Yoga doesn’t judge me!!! (And by the way, I’m WAY better at half-moon pose than her, so it’s all good).
Turns out Yoga doesn’t judge Sniffy-Grunty Guy either, so I guess I need to knock it off. (But seriously, he sniffs. And grunts. And he snores during Shavasana! Not Cool!)
During class, we are challenged NOT to achieve perfection in the poses, but to consider this… how well do you understand what you’re trying to accomplish, and what are you doing to get there? It’s experiential! It’s a Life Metaphor friends!! All that bending, stretching, twisting and breathing is the basis for our approach to life…how to deal with the hard stuff and adjust to succeed.
“You try, you fail, you try, you fail….but the only real failure is when you stop trying.” (Leota from Haunted Mansion, smart words girl!)
Let’s not stop quite yet. There’s more to come, more to try.
A little sneak peek at what I’m trying this weekend….it includes meditation mats and hair modeling. Maybe together, maybe not.
My success is dependent upon my failures; each time I fail, I gain a skill without which that certain success would not exist. – Tiffany Swedeen
(yep, that’s my quote. Unless someone else said it first. In that case, insert their name here)
Give yourself Grace this weekend. Allow the “failures”. Just fail better next time. Try some yoga maybe…You can’t fail at that. But watch out for you-know-who.(sniff, grunt, snore)